Day Z – Helldivers

Welcome to this Day Z review. I just picked up Helldivers and I’m excited to tell you all about that new game smell and feel

I stumbled upon Helldivers while searching for a fun game to do with my girlfriend.

You know, a dreary Saturday evening, nothing on the TV, and she says:

“Hey hun, lets play some games on your PS4. Can we play that fighting game… what’s it called? Injustice?”

After a beating that lasted 40 rounds she got really annoyed and my playing-really-bad-strategy was upgrading that annoyance in pure hate.

*Mental note: Do not play Mortal Kombat X against girlfriend.

HELLDIVERS™_20150321163209Being a victor in-game turned me into a victim outside the game and I wasn’t keen on letting me being awesome at Injustice ruining my Saturday evening. So I went on PSN to find me a couch-coop game. On a side note: I love couch-coop games and I plead for more!
So on the small change that some high level game designer is stumbling upon this blog. Bring me more couch coop games, also you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest… WITH… A HERRING! .. but i digress.

I looked and looked and finally found Mercenary kings (this game will have its own Day Z  in a couple of days) and Helldivers.

I thought, upon reading the description in PSN, that it was a fun game and not to hard. It seemed like an arcade shooter with a top down view (looking at your character from above) like Diablo but in space… and with guns. Double win!

Well nothing could be more wrong then the ‘not to hard’ thought.

Now all of you! Dance the robot

Let me welcome you in the first minutes of Helldivers…

You start the game only to watch some intro movie about super-earth, and why you are a Helldiver. Something to do with shoving democracy down the throats of space bugs, cyborgs and mind controlling aliens. Well that are humans for ye, nothing sci-fi here. Those three races all have their own part of the galaxy to live in until when you as a Helldiver come down to ruin their party.

Once you finish the intro tutorial mission which is required to start the game (I hate that, but okay) you start the real game. Aboard your own star ship you can choose which galaxy to invade  free and install democracy. You have an assault rifle and a hand gun, a couple of grenades and some stratagems (more on that later). Choose a mission and dive down into the action!

Once on the planet you have a mission which requires you to complete 1 or more objectives and then get the hell out of there.

No biggie.

Die you filthy human

Walking around we quickly stumbled upon the first objective, also we alarmed a passing patrol. Lets start the spraying! You can walk and aim at the same time and thus bullets were ripping through the air tearing the bugs into shreds aaaaand… also my co-player. Shit, this game has friendly fire! Okay, did not know that. Once you accidentally shoot your own team mates and he or she dies you can resurrect them using a strategem (told you). You can pull up the strategem menu by pushing L1 and then you must press a combination of arrow keys. When successful you get an orb you can throw down and after 3 seconds your teammate will be alive again in an escape pod soaring to the planet. But… if you are standing in it’s landing spot you die. Yes it’s that kinda game. This game hates the ever loving shit out of you and wants you dead in every way possible.

Once you learn that standing somewhere like a moron can kill you. You can learn that you have to reload your gun after shooting it for a while. Shortly after that you learn you have only 6 magazines full of ammo that you can replenish also with a strategem. All of this is happening while you are being harassed by hordes and hordes of enemies and then you learn that this isn’t an arcade shooter at all.

It’s a tactical survival shootHELLDIVERS™_20150321164706er in space where you get your objectives done and get of the planet while you are attacked by the planets inhabitants. After dying lots and lots of times, crying in a corner, yelling against each other, we managed to finish all the objectives and to summon the shuttle that gets us from the planet…

In 1 minutes and 30 seconds.


Jesus, fuck!!! Really? Alright this is where we are making our last stand. I’m popping my defensive turret strategem onto the ground and some more ammunition. Okay buggy bastards, we are ready. In a distance we could hear them screech. They were coming. I made the stupid mistake to stand in the line of fire of my own defensive turret and died horrible again. Yes! Also the game’s own (should have known by then) defensive shit can kill you. Luckily I was resurrected by my lovely girl.

Liters blood (or gallons whatever rocks your boat) were spilled. Eight legged creatures left legless on the ground. Everywhere the smell of iron and gunpowder. It was beautiful. On the ground a shadow was cast which meant our salvation. The shuttle came down to pick us up. Finally we would leave this place! I watched when the shuttle came down to save me… all the way down right upon my face.

I died.

Yes even the freaking ship that was there to extract me after a mission ‘well done’ killed me, like a big flying metal middle finger.
But even after all this, looking death in the eye, I can sit down with him and pet him on the back. I freaking love this game!

I am off to play more. LONG LIVE DEMOCRACY!!!

Stay tuned to see if democracy wins.

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